What do you think is the most common mistake even smart women (and men) make that leaves them struggling with stress and worry about their futures… or their child’s?
What did you come up with? I’d love to hear your thoughts: share them on Facebook and see below for the single biggest mistake I see in my work.
The most common mistake I see even smart women and men make — that leaves them stressed about their own(or their child’s) future– is striving to “measure up” against an external standard. Often I see (even highly successful) women, men, and young adults who believe they are
not “measuring up” (not smart enough, successful enough, motivated enough, talented enough, valued enough… you get the picture).
This makes it nearly impossible to see the perfection in each of us and the unlimited gifts we have, right here, right now. Seeing ourselves as flawed in our own eyes, or someone else’s, undermines our confidence, sense of agency, life spirit, and happiness. It’s a mistake I’ve made myself. So what’s the alternative?
Give yourself a break.
Instead of measuring-up, try lightening-up. Contrary to common opinion, the best way to feel better and get better results is to look for the best in you (and others), without judging or comparing performance to someone (or something) else. Lightening-up is also about building hope, excitement, awe, enthusiasm, playfulness, calm and love– which happen to be the best ways to build more confidence, happiness and success.
“Listening Up” is another way to give yourself a break… for more on this, see my “What I’d Say if You Wouldn’t Roll Your Eyes” note, “Listening Up.“